by Bryan Golden

Circumstances can be annoying.  Your car won’t start.  You wind up on the slowest checkout line at the supermarket.  You can’t find something.   It rains all weekend.

The actions of others can also be annoying.  Another person is rude.  Someone doesn’t hold the door.  A car cuts you off. People are talking during a movie.  Your boss is in a bad mood. The list of irritations is practically endless.  They have an uncanny tendency to pop up at the worst times.
It’s virtually impossible to get through a day without encountering someone or something annoying.   Your frame of mind at the time of an annoyance determines your reaction, or whether you react at all.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and stressed out, the smallest annoyance can seem overwhelming.

Small, insignificant happenings then feel like major events.  As a result, you may overreact which can exacerbate the impact of an originally minor annoyance.  When minor events get blown out of proportion, they transform into major situations.

It is hard to be happy when you are constantly feeling annoyed.  People who are miserable find they encounter an endless stream of crisis situations.  In reality, they are merely overreacting to what are minor annoyances to those in a good frame of mind.

Left unchecked, annoyances will spiral out of control until they become a major event.  Rude, or even unintentional behavior, can trigger uncontrolled anger that can have tragic results.  When you allow you emotions to go haywire, you will say or do things you may, at the very least, regret.

When you are in good spirits, annoyances don’t seem to matter much, if at all.  With an upbeat attitude, you just shrug things off.  Also, you tend to find solutions much more readily than when you are stressed.

What techniques can you use to keep life’s annoyances from becoming major calamities?  Start by keeping things in perspective.  You know when a situation is an annoyance rather than a major event.  Stay calm.  Say to yourself, “this is no big deal.”  Let it go.  Don’t allow your ego to take over.

Don’t be paranoid.  A “why does this always happen to me” attitude won’t accomplish anything positive.  People are not out to get you.  You are not being targeted.  Everyone has to deal with annoyances.  You’ve gotten past them before and you will do so again.

Allow annoyances to roll off your back.   Annoyances will always be a part of your life.  Look to always make the best of a situation.  Laugh more.  There is some humor in virtually every situation.  The more you let the small stuff go, the happier you will be.

NOW AVAILABLE:  “Dare to Live Without Limits,” the book.  Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.   2006 Bryan Golden

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