Have you noticed the many ways people pull together during trying times? Our community offers myriad examples of organizations and individuals adapting and working side-by-side to strengthen our beautiful coastline region during the current economic challenges.
After 95 years in existence, the Mystic Arts Center (MAC) is both adept at adaptation and enjoying a renewed surge of collaboration with some of the fabulous organizations of our region. Together we work to improve and diversify our offerings to community members and the visitors who come to explore our lovely region.
The MAC has forged a very successful relationship with Olde Mistick Village Art Cinemas which now hosts our monthly Artists Cinema Series featuring one-time showings of critically acclaimed art films. Special introductions and post-film discussions are then led by local film experts or enthusiasts, providing background on artists, films and filmmakers.
The film series offers inexpensive entertainment and a fun way to get lost for several hours while learning about the often infamous antics of famous artists. The first film is “Carrington,” screened on February 22; and continues with “Surviving Picasso” starring Anthony Hopkins on March 22, and “Factory Girl” starring Sienna Miller on April 26. For more information about tickets and show times, visit www.mysticarts.org.
Another new collaboration began recently between seven downtown Mystic art galleries. Arts In Mystic is a monthly gallery stroll, held from 6-8pm on the first Thursday of each month, when the galleries extend their hours and offer refreshments or music for art lovers. It’s a great way to take in a wide variety of exhibitions and gallery styles. For more information about this gallery stroll, visit www.artsinmystic.org.
On February 7th, the MAC is proud to partner with the Mystic yoga studio Yoga Shala to host a three-hour chanting workshop with acclaimed singer/chanter Krishna Das. The afternoon workshop includes call and response chanting, talks about the spiritual path, and a forum for questions and answers. This is something very unique for our area, and an exciting enrichment opportunity for all who attend.
And there is so much more! We hope you will dabble in the incredibly diverse array of activities offered throughout our region. Creativity is a very effective stress reducer in busy lives. The Mystic Arts Center is a non-profit community arts organization dedicated to serving the region’s artistic, cultural and creative needs through studio education, exhibitions and educational outreach programming. We hope to see you in the galleries! Please visit us at 9 Water Street, Mystic, www.mysticarts.org or call 860.536.7601.
Best Wishes,
Brandy Kolmer
Director of External Relations
Mystic Arts Center
Kensington’s Restaurant and Ascot’s Pub at The Spa at Norwich Inn are offering value-conscious diners some very good deals and very delicious dining in February and March.
For Valentine’s Day on Wednesday, February 14th, take your sweetheart to the romantic dining room at Kensington’s for a splendid dinner for only $49.95 per person, plus tax and tip. The special menu includes a choice of appetizer, including oysters or shrimp, a choice of soup or salad, a Rose Champagne Sorbet as an intermezzo, and entree choices including. among others, Beef Wellington for Two and a Four-Pound Lobster for Two. Desserts for Two are a choice of White Chocolate and Raspberry Souffle or Molten Lava Chocolate Cake. Mmmmmm!
For reservations and a complete menu for this prix-fixe culinary extravagance at a very reasonable price price, please call 860.425.3630.
Everyone loves saving money, and coupons are a good way to make that happen. From now until March 31, diners can download coupons from the spa’s website with special savings for dining formally in Kensington’s or informally Ascot’s Pub.
At Ascot’s, from Sunday through Friday, the coupon provides the choice of either a “Burger & Beer Deal” from their “All Day” menu for $15.95 for each member of the party, or the opportunity to purchase any two entrees and receive a complimentary appetizer.
In Kensington’s, the coupon, presented Sunday through Friday, allows a party of four to order three entrees and receive the fourth entree for free, or to receive a free glass of house wine with each full-priced entree purchased. To print out coupons and read the full terms and conditions, go on the web to www.thespaatnorwichinn.com and click on “Dining Coupons.”
Yankee Magazine named The Spa at Norwich Inn as the “Best Destination Spa in New England.” New England Travel & Life agrees; it named The Spa at Norwich Inn “Best Resort in CT” in its 2006 issue.
Kensington’s features sophisticated cuisine in an elegant atmosphere. While all of the food is healthfully prepared and beautifully presented, the menu offers a wide range of choices. If you want a fine red wine (Kensington’s wine cellar won awards from Wine Spectator magazine), a great steak and a decadent chocolate dessert, you can find them at Kensington’s. The menu has an abundance of choices to delight carnivores, seafood stalwarts and even vegetarians
Kensington’s was voted Best Lunch in New London County and Best Vegetarian in New London County for 2009 by the Readers’ Choice Poll in CT Magazine.
Are you a doormat? Do you see yourself as having little or no personal power with other people? Do you seek validation from others because you lack confidence in your own abilities and because you have poor self-esteem? Do you feel worthless, accepting a victim/martyr role in your relationships with other people?
If so, other people may think of you-and you may think of yourself-as a doormat. “We can borrow Ed’s tools, he won’t mind. We don’t have to consider what Shirley would like, she’ll go anywhere we decide. Let’s volunteer Sandy for the job, she’s good at doing it quickly and she won’t complain about it.”
Although these traits are at the heart of unselfish, loving, generous and mature behavior, a doormat is not exactly acting loving and mature. A doormat perpetually goes without and acts responsible for others to the exclusion of taking care of themselves. They do for others instead of for themselves.
The name for people who look outside themselves for self-worth, relying on others-or external sources-for self-validation, is the poorly labeled term “co-dependent.” Codependency is at the heart of being a doormat. It is a pattern of learned beliefs and behaviors about how to manipulate other people into needing you and-or loving you because you don’t feel worthy on your own merits.
This pattern of behavior frequently begins “when a parent has become helpless through alcohol, drugs, mental or physical illness or a lifetime of irresponsibility. To survive, children may take over the household at an early age,” writes Lynn Namka in the book The Doormat Syndrome. The child gives up part of himself/herself to take care of parents, siblings or others in the family. The child becomes a miniature adult, feeling responsible for the care of those around them.
Doormats have a secret hope that things will get better. Wanting to believe in a marriage, a relationship or a job so strongly that they overlook personal inconveniences and sacrifices again and again. They may gripe to others, but rarely with the people with whom they need to settle the disagreement or grievance. They believe others prevent them from speaking out, but they aren’t secure enough to say what they feel and need.
Neil Rosenthal is a licensed marriage and family therapist in Denver and Boulder, CO, specializing in how people strengthen their intimate relationships. He can be reached at 303. 758.8777, or e-mail him from his website, heartrelationships.com.
Selling yourself short results from undervaluing your abilities, capabilities, potential, and worth. Whenever someone sells himself or herself short, they limit, from the start, what they’ll be able to accomplish.
There are numerous reasons people give for selling themselves short. They proclaim they’re too old, too young, not smart enough, don’t know enough, don’t have enough time, don’t have the right connections, or don’t know where to start.
When you sell yourself short, you hold yourself back. You set an artificial barrier your mind believes is true. As a result, your mind won’t allow you to get past your self-imposed boundary.
This self-imposed restriction is based on a lack of belief in one’s self. It becomes a constant source of self-criticism which is far more destructive than fault finding by others. Your perceived reality is shaped and reinforced by your short selling proclamations.
You can become so used to selling yourself short that you aren’t aware you are doing it. Your negative reaction to opportunity becomes an involuntary response. A cycle of self-fulfilling prophecy that validates your initial beliefs is then created. Consequently, your false premises are transformed in your mind into fact.
I try to motivate people, who are selling themselves short, by pointing out how much they are capable of. Invariably, they construct a vociferous argument as to the validity of their beliefs. Their thinking has become so entrenched they adamantly resist any outside attempt to encourage removal of any mental barriers.
At the age of 55, Mark was laid off from a job he had held for the last 20 years. He doubted he could effectively compete with younger people for a new job. Mark halfheartedly applied for a few positions in his field. After several interviews without an offer, Mark became convinced his age was a liability.
Mark lowered his expectations. He applied for jobs below his skill level. Ultimately he took a position that wasn’t based on his many years of experience. Although Mark was frustrated and unhappy, he was resigned to live with his perceived age limitation. As soon as Mark convinced himself he couldn’t get the job he wanted, he effectively eliminated any possibility he would.
A better strategy for Mark would have been to enthusiastically market his experience, skill, and maturity. Especially in today’s labor pool, knowledge and competence are a valuable asset to any employer. Mark had many qualifications younger job prospects just didn’t possess.
You have a choice. You can sell yourself short and come up with reasons why you can’t do what you want. Or, you can identify reasons you can succeed. Then start today taking the necessary steps to reach your goal. Either way, you will meet your expectations.
NOW AVAILABLE: “Dare to Live Without Limits,” the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.
ARIES (Mar. 21 to Apr. 19) Although you’re getting kudos and other positive reactions to your suggestions, don’t let the cheers drown out some valid criticisms. Better to deal with them now than later.
TAURUS (Apr. 20 to May 20) Following your keen Bovine intuition pays off, as you not only reassess the suggestions some people are putting in front of you, but also their agendas for doing so.
GEMINI (May 21 to Jun. 20) You continue on a high-enthusiasm cycle as that new project you’ve assumed takes shape. You’re also buoyed by the anticipation of receiving some good news about a personal matter.
CANCER (Jun. 21 to Jul. 22) Your eagerness to immerse yourself in your new assignment is understandable. But be careful that you don’t forget to take care of that pressing personal situation as well.
LEO (Jul. 23 to Aug. 22) This is a good time to learn a new skill that could give a clever Cat an edge in the upcoming competition for workplace opportunities. Enjoy the arts this weekend with someone special.
VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) You could risk creating an impasse if you insist on expecting more from others than they’re prepared to give. Showing flexibility in what you’ll accept could prevent a stalemate.
LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) Although you can weigh all factors of a dispute to find an agreeable solution for others, you might need the skilled input of someone you trust to help you deal with an ongoing situation of your own.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov.21) The good news is that your brief period of self-doubt turns into a positive “I can do anything” attitude. The better news is that you’ll soon be able to prove it.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) This is a good time for Sagittarians to start making travel plans while you can still select from a wide menu of choices and deals, and not be forced to settle for leftovers.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) Like your zodiacal sign, the sure-footed Goat, you won’t allow obstacles in your path to keep you from reaching your goal. Don’t be surprised by who asks to go along with you.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18) Let your head dominate your heart as you consider the risks that might be involved in agreeing to be a friend’s co-signer or otherwise act as his or her backup in a financial matter.
PISCES (Feb. 19 to Mar. 20) Prioritize: Resolve to close the door and let your voice mail take your phone calls while you finish up a task before the end-of-week deadline. Then go out and enjoy a fun-filled weekend.
Have you noticed the many ways people pull together during trying times? Our community offers myriad examples of organizations and individuals adapting and working side-by-side to strengthen our beautiful coastline region during the current economic challenges.
